I seriously considered titling this post: Alone with the F'Bomb. Seriously, what up "Alone in the Dark"? Why does your dialogue sound so bad? I agree with Shane Bettenhausen, of 1UP and EGM fame, that I really want to love this game. And not because the protagonist on the box looks just like former EGM'er Mark MacDonald, and not because the lead female looks a lot like X-Play's Morgan Webb, either.
Although, I do believe this star-powered videogame duo could very well thwart the paranormal invasion of NYC, I want to love "Alone in the Dark" because its tries to involve players in their world, and its this emphasis on so much tedium where it fails miserably. Interactions with the vast devices feels clunky. I could only imagine what gestural controls could do for this game, but I'm not looking to find out.
I know I'll see this one through to the end, if only for the achievements. But I hope I'll have more reasons to remember "Alone in the Dark" besides a way to boost my gamerscore.